I didn't spend very much
time dating at all during my teen years. Oh, I
guess there were a couple of boys - one who was really
serious, too. But I didn't want to get married.
I had always taken marriage very seriously,
and just couldn't think of anyone that I would be
willing to promise my whole life to! Then one day I
happened to pull into a Derby gas station. And
THERE HE WAS!!! The love and light of my life,
Donald Grant Loy!! He was the station manager at
that time. These were the days before self-service
became the "norm". As he strode toward my
car, he had the most gorgeous tan, the fluffiest, light
brown hair, the sweetest grin, and the most beautiful
sparkling, sapphire blue eyes! It's true!
There really is such a thing as "love
at first sight!" Despite my total adoration of
this man, I only went to the gas station about every
other week, whenever I needed another "fill".
I was exhilarated . . . I was in heaven . . . but I
was so scared and shy!! I just didn't know what to
say to this beautiful person, I was in such awe!
My awkwardness and shyness was only multiplied when
this man started flirting with me - big time!
I was so thrilled, yet so scared to be around him!
Don had been a deputy sheriff
for 3 1/2 years before he managed that gas station.
The county elections were coming up in a few
months. Many of his friends and customers
approached him and asked him to run for sheriff.
The current sheriff was not well-liked by most of
the county, and everyone liked Don. He had many
friends. So he decided to run for the office . . .
and won. Before he won, he promised me that he
would hire me as his secretary if he won the election.
And he did. I was so scared to start
working in the Sheriff's Office . . . didn't think I
could do it. But Don had a lot of patience with me,
and soon everything was "old hat" for me.
Within a year, I attended the Iowa Law Enforcement
Academy, became a certified peace officer, and Don
deputized me. We soon forged a friendship and bond
that lasted for nearly 20 years and eventually grew into
a strong love and marriage.
There were many tense moments
during those twelve years when Don was sheriff. One
night, he was nearly killed when jumped by three young thugs, who severely beat him with his own night stick and
shattered his jaw. He suffered such a severely
broken jaw that he could not eat solid food for 3 1/2
years! I always worried about him going out to a
dangerous situation.
After he left the Sheriff's
Office, we were married. I didn't get married until
I was 36 years old. Don had been the only person to
have ever truly captured my heart. There were so
many beautiful memories during our marriage - winter
sledding in the country with our then-puppy, Maxy,
tagging along and "bouncing" through the snow
like a bunny rabbit, while we sledded. We also
enjoyed cool evening walks to a city park and enjoyed
it's beautiful, lighted water fountain.
Five years after we were
married, Don began to feel ill. He began to cough
and lose weight. Early on, we thought he just had a
bad chest cold. Finally he went to the doctor.
Soon came the incredible, heart-wrenching news.
LUNG CANCER!!! Life, as we knew it, ground to
a halt. For over a year, we went through an
incredible nightmarish world of surgery, radiation
treatments, hospice, and ultimately, the death of the
most important person in my life! Thus, my life and
my existence ended. IT WAS OVER . . . KAPUT . . .
NOTHING!!
For three long years, I lived
in a "vacuum". Nothing much "got
through to me." Slowly, I started the long
climb back to civilization. Today I am married to a
wonderful man, John Gray. We've been married for 6
years now.
Though I am happy and once
again content in life, I will always have a very special
place in my heart for Don - my first real love.
Don Loy was liked and admired
by many people. Upon his passing, our local Chief
of Police stated in Don's obituary, "Don Loy - he
was the greatest lawman I ever knew. No one knew
the law like Don. He was a great officer, and it
was a privilege to work with him. Don Loy - I just
can't say enough about him."
Don - may you rest in peace!
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